I’m the Actual Worst

It’s been mentioned once or twice that other Lokeans tend to get a lot of side eye in the community for some reason or another. Whether it’s because they use their affinity for Loki to excuse bad behavior, or they’re drawn into heathenry because of Marvel’s movies gifting us with Hiddles!Loki, or whatever, we tend to be the crazies of the community. 

Last night, while texting a Lokean friend, I was joking about being a Lokian nun and needing to make a nun’s habit out of one of my fox pelts. This came about because she was “whining” because she’s become a more active Lokean since meeting me, and she was talking with someone else and that conversation resulted in Himself giving her instructions about what he wants for Yule (gingerbread houses, of course). She remarked, “This is why I avoid other Lokeans. Y’all got me being observant and shit.”

I teased back, acknowledging that I’m probably the twerpiest of the bunch because I’m pretty insane and super vocal and obnoxious about Loki everywhere in my life. She made the grave mistake of saying, “I don’t find you obnoxious and I find most Lokeans eyeroll worthy so…”

So I responded with this:

Yup, I’m wearing a fleece poncho, because I’m stylish and enjoy flapping around the house like a plaid bat.

“See?” I texted. “Obnoxious. The worst. I’m like a demented flying nun. I can’t even stand myself sometimes.”

Then I took a picture which for me passes as “cute,” the one featured at the top of this post. And that’s where it all went downhill.

This particular pelt was acquired by a good friend of mine many, many years ago. He’s an artist and leatherworker, and he had a very, very strong urge to make a Loki mask for me. Alas, he was in a truly nasty motorcycle accident several years back, and he’s still in recovery and playing catchup with his various projects, so he gave me the pelt for safekeeping. It’s been on display around the shoulders of the dress form in the background of the above pic, and what with me being a terrible housekeeper, it hasn’t been dusted or cleaned in YEARS. 

So of course I shoved the super-dusty tail into my face for a photo op. Because I just had to prove how obnoxious and twerpy and annoying I am. And I inhaled deeply, because I was giggling, and all of the dust from the tail relocated to my sinus cavity. I can practically smell the sinus infection that’s sure to follow this foolery. 

I gave myself plague from a fox pelt, trying to be Obnoxiouser-Than-Thou. 

Of course, there’s a lovely bit of a poetic parallel to that, seeing how I have a YouTube channel called PlagueFox. At least, I think that’s still the name of the channel. I had to fix something with my GMail account, and I think it affected the channel name, too. But hey, turns out that I’m not PlagueFox, I HAVE a plague fox. I got plague from a fox. Probably.

I bet this is exactly why my mom keeps warning me I’m not to get any pelts while we’re in Iceland next year. It has nothing to do with how they look as home decor (Cozy! I say. Weird! she says) and everything to do with the fact I’ll give myself various plagues. She knows me better than she wants to, I think. 

So yes, I’m the actual worst. I willingly inject my sinuses with dust and dander just to prove how annoying I am. And I wonder why we Loki-twerps get such a bad rap!

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